So, it's been a full year since I've written anything. I'd apologize for it but let's face it, I don't really care. It's not like I've really had anything to write about. I mean, my baseball team sucked, as was expected, and I've spent significantly less time in a bikini than I'd like. Also, I have a habit of venting on Twitter instead of on here. Oops.
A couple months ago I decided that I needed to make a change in my life. It hit me that at some point between graduating high school __ years ago and now, I've become a completely different person. I don't hate the person I've become but I don't want to completely lose the person that I was and I feel as if I'm close to losing that part of myself.
I used to be this happy, bubbly girl. At some point that bubbly personality has turned into a sarcastic, sassy, "I don't give a fuck" bitch. I don't hate that at all. In fact, I love it. I love that I don't hesitate to call someone out for bullshit and that I don't back down when someone comes at me. You want to start shit with me, let's go. I'm not going to sit there and let you belittle or berate me. However, I do miss the part of me that was happy more than angry, sad or feeling nothing at all. I don't know where she went or what caused her to leave. I mean the world going to hell in a hand-basket is probably what caused her to leave, in part, but that has killed a lot of peoples happiness. It may also have been caused by the medication I have taken over the years for anxiety and nearly daily headaches.
I'm determined to find that bubbly personality again and while I'm searching for it, I'm going to try to be more positive and not let things piss me off so easily. The latter has been a STRUGGLE lately. So much so that I had to take a Twitter break because the tiniest things would put me in such a shit mood. I don't know if I was already irritable or what but I was having none of it when people would sass me. Ironic, huh? I'm fully aware that I'm the one usually giving out the sass and "couldn't handle it" when it was given back to me lately. Except usually I don't care if you sass me because I'll do it right back. It wouldn't have been as big of a deal as it was had it not been from people who should know me well enough by now to know when not to push my buttons. Also, these same people would never have the balls to do that to my face which just made it even worse.
Anyway, I need to focus on me and what I can do to make myself a better version of me. It's difficult to be more positive when the people you're around regularly are one extreme to the next. Either they're WAY TOO perky or WAY TOO bah humbug. I need a middle ground. I need to stop letting the world crush my soul and find my inner hippie. A little more peace and love and a little less I hate everyone. In my defense, people are proving to be more and more terrible as the years go by but still. We all need to find our inner hippie. Hopefully, I can find mine and get that middle ground I'm looking for.
Jinx You Owe Me a Coke or Nah
I'm going to try and keep this short but this topic has been bothering me on and off throughout the last few years, jinxes and superstitions.
One thing I will NEVER understand is how anyone can be a sports fan and not believe in them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with saying jinxes are real and superstitions work. What harm is there in believing in this?! I'm sorry you hate fun, but don't fuck shit up for others. You not wanting to have fun with something knowing there are people who truly believe in these things just pisses those people off. It's fine to have your opinion but to go out of your way to make sure people you know who are into jinxes and superstitions feel like an idiot for having fun is just rude. Keep that shit to yourself. I'm not going to make you feel like a fucktard if you're into something I think is stupid so why would you do that to someone else?! Your opinion is no better than anyone else's so stop acting like it. While I may not actually be a hardcore jinx believer, you can bet your ass I'm going to be pissed if someone is throwing a no hitter and you announce it to the world. Shut your whore mouth and let us have the moment. If not, you will be getting all of the blame.
I'm well aware that jinxes don't always work, ie me trying to jinx Lincecum's no hitter at Petco, but that shouldn't mean it's ok for you to ruin someone else's fun. Believing that if you speak about the no-no will cause it to end, connects us the team in some silly way. You know damn well that the guys in the dugout are abiding by the rules of the jinx and are keeping their mouths shut. If they're doing that it should only be fair that you do it to. I mean this has an affect on the players. Us, not so much. We don't get to mark down a personal record that will be in the history books forever. I mean sure, for the Padres, it'll get marked in the history books but our individual names won't be. You don't have a problem with the pitcher jumping over the chalk every inning or a batter using a teammates bat because that teammate had a hit streak with it so why do you have a problem with people keeping their mouths shut during a possible historic moment for someone??
With all that said, I leave you with this, respect the superstition and the jinx, have some fun and don't be an asshole.
One thing I will NEVER understand is how anyone can be a sports fan and not believe in them. There is absolutely nothing wrong with saying jinxes are real and superstitions work. What harm is there in believing in this?! I'm sorry you hate fun, but don't fuck shit up for others. You not wanting to have fun with something knowing there are people who truly believe in these things just pisses those people off. It's fine to have your opinion but to go out of your way to make sure people you know who are into jinxes and superstitions feel like an idiot for having fun is just rude. Keep that shit to yourself. I'm not going to make you feel like a fucktard if you're into something I think is stupid so why would you do that to someone else?! Your opinion is no better than anyone else's so stop acting like it. While I may not actually be a hardcore jinx believer, you can bet your ass I'm going to be pissed if someone is throwing a no hitter and you announce it to the world. Shut your whore mouth and let us have the moment. If not, you will be getting all of the blame.
I'm well aware that jinxes don't always work, ie me trying to jinx Lincecum's no hitter at Petco, but that shouldn't mean it's ok for you to ruin someone else's fun. Believing that if you speak about the no-no will cause it to end, connects us the team in some silly way. You know damn well that the guys in the dugout are abiding by the rules of the jinx and are keeping their mouths shut. If they're doing that it should only be fair that you do it to. I mean this has an affect on the players. Us, not so much. We don't get to mark down a personal record that will be in the history books forever. I mean sure, for the Padres, it'll get marked in the history books but our individual names won't be. You don't have a problem with the pitcher jumping over the chalk every inning or a batter using a teammates bat because that teammate had a hit streak with it so why do you have a problem with people keeping their mouths shut during a possible historic moment for someone??
With all that said, I leave you with this, respect the superstition and the jinx, have some fun and don't be an asshole.
Land of the Free... but Only if You're White
Dear white people,
Sincerely, me
I know not ALL white people are to blame because not all are pieces of shit but it's easier to generalize in this case. With all this unnecessary controversy about athletes kneeling during the National Anthem, I felt the need to voice my opinion sans Twitter and what better place to do so than my own blog.
I may not agree with your opinion about what these athletes are doing and I don't really care. I will respect your right to have that idiotic opinion but I'm not going to get all pissy because you're not doing what I think you should be doing. So go ahead and boycott the NFL because players are exercising their rights to protest all the bullshit that is going on in America. Bullshit that by the way, should have been dead and gone a LONG time ago. In boycotting, you're essentially doing what you don't want these players to do, exercising their rights. Hypocritical much??
Personally, I don't care whether you stand, kneel, sit, scratch your balls, suck a dick or pick your ass during the National Anthem. It's your choice, you do you. Ok, maybe the sucking dick one shouldn't be done... in public at least. My point being, whatever you decide to do has no affect on me and what others do should have no affect on you. If it does, you need help. The world doesn't revolve around you. You are not God's gift to the human race. You are simply a regular person who lacks an abundance of melanin. I know there's plenty of you who love being tan. Guess what, that's melanin. I truly wonder how many people would stop tanning and be their true pasty selves if they knew melanin is literally, the only thing that differentiates them from any other race.
And can I just say how unbelievably stupid that Jessie James Decker chicks comment was about her husband being "tricked" into staying in the locker room during the National Anthem?! Come on dude, you've been a football player for how long and STILL don't know what time your games start?! I'm gonna go ahead and suggest you get your brain scanned because you must be experiencing some symptoms of CTE already if you don't know when your game starts after all this time. Or better yet, just quit playing to save your already fragile brain from further damage and stay out of the spotlight so your wife can't make idiotic comments like that again. Sure her reasoning for "respecting" the National Anthem was family members in the military. Well, I also had family members in the military and I know damn well, that they didn't fight for a flag, they fought for our freedom. Not standing for a song isn't disrespecting those in the military, it's exercising a right that they fought for us to have and to keep.
So stop with this KKK, white supremacy and all this other "I'm better than you" bullshit. It is 2017 for fucks sake. Get over yourselves.
Stop being assholes.
Sincerely, me
I know not ALL white people are to blame because not all are pieces of shit but it's easier to generalize in this case. With all this unnecessary controversy about athletes kneeling during the National Anthem, I felt the need to voice my opinion sans Twitter and what better place to do so than my own blog.
I may not agree with your opinion about what these athletes are doing and I don't really care. I will respect your right to have that idiotic opinion but I'm not going to get all pissy because you're not doing what I think you should be doing. So go ahead and boycott the NFL because players are exercising their rights to protest all the bullshit that is going on in America. Bullshit that by the way, should have been dead and gone a LONG time ago. In boycotting, you're essentially doing what you don't want these players to do, exercising their rights. Hypocritical much??
Personally, I don't care whether you stand, kneel, sit, scratch your balls, suck a dick or pick your ass during the National Anthem. It's your choice, you do you. Ok, maybe the sucking dick one shouldn't be done... in public at least. My point being, whatever you decide to do has no affect on me and what others do should have no affect on you. If it does, you need help. The world doesn't revolve around you. You are not God's gift to the human race. You are simply a regular person who lacks an abundance of melanin. I know there's plenty of you who love being tan. Guess what, that's melanin. I truly wonder how many people would stop tanning and be their true pasty selves if they knew melanin is literally, the only thing that differentiates them from any other race.
And can I just say how unbelievably stupid that Jessie James Decker chicks comment was about her husband being "tricked" into staying in the locker room during the National Anthem?! Come on dude, you've been a football player for how long and STILL don't know what time your games start?! I'm gonna go ahead and suggest you get your brain scanned because you must be experiencing some symptoms of CTE already if you don't know when your game starts after all this time. Or better yet, just quit playing to save your already fragile brain from further damage and stay out of the spotlight so your wife can't make idiotic comments like that again. Sure her reasoning for "respecting" the National Anthem was family members in the military. Well, I also had family members in the military and I know damn well, that they didn't fight for a flag, they fought for our freedom. Not standing for a song isn't disrespecting those in the military, it's exercising a right that they fought for us to have and to keep.
So stop with this KKK, white supremacy and all this other "I'm better than you" bullshit. It is 2017 for fucks sake. Get over yourselves.
Have You Done a Good Deed Lately?
As we all know the world is losing its mind. We have an orange clown for a President who makes me incredibly sad that the country hasn't evolved in hundreds of years, North Korea is trying to shoot off missiles and shit, there's a handful of hurricanes and fires happening at once and giant ass earthquakes too. Despite all the craziness that is going on, I'm trying to find and remember the happiness that once was. With all the Nazi and white supremacy shit going on I had found myself trying to remind people there is still good in the world by posting puppy gifs on Twitter every day for the first week or so after the whole tiki torch racist bullshit. It might not be much but it's enough to make you forget for a split second that there are terrible humans in this world.
Now to the point of this post. A few nights ago I went to a Padres game and as I was walking back to my car I was excited to see this homeless man sitting with his little dog outside of the parking structure. I know it's weird to say I was excited to see a homeless person but I really was. I had seen him many times before on my way back to my car. He isn't vocal and sits there with a sign that asks for food. The first few times I would pass him I did what the majority of people would do, walk past and not make eye contact because I didn't want to feel like a terrible person for catching his gaze and giving false hope that I'd be able to help. Almost every time I got in my car and I was already on my way home I would remember that I had food in my purse that I knew I wasn't going to eat anytime soon. Last weekend, I went to the doubleheader and each time I went back to my car I looked to see if he was out there because I finally remembered ahead of time that I had food I could give him. He wasn't there. Well on Thursday night, he was there and like I said, I was excited to see him. I purposely walked up to him, probably getting in others ways, and pulled out some graham crackers I had in my purse and handed it to him. I told him I also had some water too and handed that to him as well. He was so grateful for the little food and water I had to give him that it made me so happy that I was able to do that for him.
I wasn't planning on writing about this because I'm a firm believer of not needing to let the world know you did a good deed. So I'm not telling this to humble brag about my kindness that night but to hopefully encourage others to do something nice for someone who needs it the most. I'm not the most empathetic or sympathetic person, I'm kind of a robot actually, but for some reason that man had been on my mind and I knew that I needed to do what I could for him. With all this craziness going on in the world I must be feeling the need to try and makeup for all the assholes. Unfortunately I will never be able to make up for all of them on my own so can the non assholes step up and help a girl out?!
Now to the point of this post. A few nights ago I went to a Padres game and as I was walking back to my car I was excited to see this homeless man sitting with his little dog outside of the parking structure. I know it's weird to say I was excited to see a homeless person but I really was. I had seen him many times before on my way back to my car. He isn't vocal and sits there with a sign that asks for food. The first few times I would pass him I did what the majority of people would do, walk past and not make eye contact because I didn't want to feel like a terrible person for catching his gaze and giving false hope that I'd be able to help. Almost every time I got in my car and I was already on my way home I would remember that I had food in my purse that I knew I wasn't going to eat anytime soon. Last weekend, I went to the doubleheader and each time I went back to my car I looked to see if he was out there because I finally remembered ahead of time that I had food I could give him. He wasn't there. Well on Thursday night, he was there and like I said, I was excited to see him. I purposely walked up to him, probably getting in others ways, and pulled out some graham crackers I had in my purse and handed it to him. I told him I also had some water too and handed that to him as well. He was so grateful for the little food and water I had to give him that it made me so happy that I was able to do that for him.
I wasn't planning on writing about this because I'm a firm believer of not needing to let the world know you did a good deed. So I'm not telling this to humble brag about my kindness that night but to hopefully encourage others to do something nice for someone who needs it the most. I'm not the most empathetic or sympathetic person, I'm kind of a robot actually, but for some reason that man had been on my mind and I knew that I needed to do what I could for him. With all this craziness going on in the world I must be feeling the need to try and makeup for all the assholes. Unfortunately I will never be able to make up for all of them on my own so can the non assholes step up and help a girl out?!
New Blog. Who This??
I've decided recently that I wanted to start blogging again. I have one blog already that I haven't touched in years due to lack of motivation. So why would I want to start another that would basically be the same as the first?? Because I came up with the most perfect name that describes me. Baseball and Bikinis, as you can see. The only way the name could be more me is if it referenced animals and medicine too. That would be a mouthful though. "Baseball, Bikinis, Lions and Medicine: Oh, My!!" that would make an interesting post name though, hmm. Now that I've successfully gotten off topic...
I was planning on this being dedicated to my love of baseball. As you can see, I can't stick to one thought. Some days this might be about baseball and others might be about my adventures around town or basically whatever I feel like writing about when I feel the urge to write. Hopefully, I can keep the topics somewhat consistent but it is me so that probably won't happen. With all that being said, I'll try to post more than once every blue moon. Here's hoping.
I was planning on this being dedicated to my love of baseball. As you can see, I can't stick to one thought. Some days this might be about baseball and others might be about my adventures around town or basically whatever I feel like writing about when I feel the urge to write. Hopefully, I can keep the topics somewhat consistent but it is me so that probably won't happen. With all that being said, I'll try to post more than once every blue moon. Here's hoping.
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